Gilligan's Crappy Green Roller Coaster, Tortillas Holes are Main Ingredient in Aluminum & Flying Bikes for The Blind

The Green movement is pretty cool and all, but does everything have to be so Gilligan's Islandy? Bamboo and coconuts just aren't good building materials for something such as a roller coaster. Especially if the passengers are someone like me and my best friend from growing up who now weighs one billion pounds. There was absolutely no non-Flinstones way to slow it down, bamboo shards flying everywhere, and the car/sled wouldn't stay on the tracks. I am lucky I'm not dead.

We are ALL lucky I'm not dead.

Am i right, am I right? huh? huh? Ok then.

Anyway after that, to rehearse for halloween, we all got in full drag and went to the movies. I didn't shave or change my personality but for some reason I was bing treated like a lady anyway.

It ain't all that great.

At the snack bar the only attendant was cleaning out the tortilla machine. He was making tortilla donuts which are nothing more than tortillas with a hole punched through the middle. He was putting the hole punches into a big container that looked destined for the trash.

"Dude, don't throw those away, I can make some awesome tortilla soup out of those tortilla holes." I said.

"Oh I'm not throwing them out, I'm gonna send them to the plant and have them turned into aluminum."

"Oh OK."

Stupid me, I didn't even know tortilla holes were one of the main ingredients in aluminum.

Google it.

Here's the link lazy ass: Tortilla Holes Main Ingredient in Aluminum

Recycling man, it's effin complex.

Oh yeah, I also had to borrow money from one of the other fake drag queens because I only brought 25 bucks. Important info for yalls.

Anyway, the biggest news is that San Francisco has finally agreed to put my Flying Bikes for the Blind into limited usage across the city. They really don't fly, they are sorta just like upside down bikes that roll along suspended from the electric bus cables. They look like they are flying, that is of course if ski lift carriages look like they are flying. Try to remember the guy who rode the bike on the tight rope in the circus, it's kinda like that.

If you're in SF you'll see them soon enough.

I hope no blindies are killed. I don't wanna get sued.

Point is:
Blind people don't know how dumb they look.

That's all for now.
Don't get caught intentionally crashing your bamboo sled into a hippy to make it stop.
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