I did three things I always wanted to do yesterday.
1) Drove a tow truck
2) Drove down a narrow hallway
3) Drove on to a weigh station with bouncy lowrider hydraulics.
It would have been really fun and momentous and stuff except my passenger was a crying old man trying to read a book to the baby he was holding. What a wuss. I mean Wusses.
Oh yeah I also 4) drove on an ice rink because the Circus on Ice was in town and of course they invited me to be in it.
I was driving the Exploding Guts Float.
Just as fun as Gallagher only with guts and on Ice.
Gallagher is a genius you know.
I stopped by my dad's house because he was wanted me to take a look at his bathroom. It seems he installed wall fountains on every wall, or at least thats how he explained it, the truth is he was just making the best out of an extremely leaky situation. I have to admit, it did look pretty cool in a cavey mossy kinda way.
He also painted all the wood floors. I didn't have the energy to get upset about it.
Later at the bar, my old drummer was doing a benefit for some emergency fund. He was wearing a rather patriotic outfit so I threw a bunch of stars and stripes at him as hard as I could. It didn't hurt him thought, largely because they were Imaginary due to the fact that I was either really tired or drunk, likely a combination of the two.
I might have even dreamt it.
Doesn't matter.
Point is:
Ice Makes Bad Entertainment Slippery
That's all for now.
Don't get caught doin ice donuts in the Exploding Guts Float to lull the baby and grampa to sleep.
Your Favorite New Drink,
Chocolate Milk & Vodka
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