The Clapping Vagina Booth, Dad Shows His Six Pack in a Soaked Suit & Short Girl With Spina Bifida Kicking Out Some Mad Moves Running Man Steeze

I went to the nerd convention down at the Crane & Swinging Cable Stadium. As usual, the dorks were in full force selling their gadgets and games in a post apocalyptic nerd circus. Apple had a pretty unorthodox set up involving some bare assed strippers clapping their vaginas in the faces of potential customers. I don't care what anybody says, vagina clapping is interesting and cool. Black ladies invented it you know, or maybe it was Snoop Dogg, anyway, point is, black people have some cool ideas when they apply themselves.

Earlier in the evening they were showing clips from some crappy old Mike Douglas movie that was never finished due to the race riots, anyway the nerds thought it would be a great idea to write the ending to the movie and complete the thing theater style on stage in the stadium while selling hard drives or some shit. It was boring as hell.

My dad showed up in a sopping wet semi transparent light blue suit and he was chuckling under his breath about how much better he'd have been in the role of the judge.

"Just go up there dad, half them nerds are improving anyway, they'd be grateful for the save."

"Psssssht, can you imagine? Gah!" my dad guffawed.

I noticed he must have been working out because he had a total six pack.

Why the fuck does my dad have a six pack?

"Dad, why do you have a six pack?"

"I don't have a six pack, why, are you thirsty?"

How does this reflect on me? Should I be concerned?

Anyway the whole nerd world tried to ssshhhh me and my dad but ssshhhhhable merkleys are NOT.

Eventually I left my dad arguing with an old woman about a vending machine and I made my way outside to snack on the crispy, peppery watercress growing in the pond by the freeway as I dodged all the falling cranes and swinging cables that gave the stadium it's name. So crunchy, so peppery, too bad I didn't have any Ranch.

Later on I hung out with a short girl with spina bifida who was really pretty good at doing the running man, I took her picture and immediately decided it was the best picture I had ever taken. It also had the best title of all time: Short Girl With Spina Bifida Kicking Out Some Mad Moves Running Man Steeze". But I guess you already read that now didn't you?

I'd show you the photo but it's too good to be shown on the internet. You'll hafta come over.

Bye.