I tagged along with a friend of mine on a golf outing. I don't like golfing. Too many silverspooners engaging in too much silverspoonery plorping out entire salad bars of silverspoonerisms with every jaw clop.
So yeah, I didn't have fun until I crashed his old Buick through his neighbors front door.
Incidentally, jackassery is a close relative and often a direct result of mega-silverspoonery.
Myself, well I'm a woodenspooner, as in born with a wooden spoon on my ass.
Speaking of child abuse, we went to a ghetto art gallery where everything was made out of stolen spray paint by knapsacky white skateboarder kids.
MORE SILVERSPOONERY!
Anyway, after that we drove down Melrose and I spotted Brad and Angelina shopping for new kids to match their new sofa. Luckily, in Hollywood, they now sell third world kids right there on Melrose.
Point being:
Adoption is The New Anitquing.
The Third World is The New Thrift Store.
That's all for now.
Don't get caught opting for woodenspooner over plasticspooner because plasticspooner would be what a silverspooner would say.
Your Top Resenter of Unwarranted and Ignernt Insinuations,
Howard Juno
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