March 05, 2008

The Boy Genius In The Monkey Suit, Who's Ascared of a Cartoon Dog & My Long Lost Aunt The Prostitute

I worked as the cameraman/host of another reality show yesterday. Tons of people showed up to be interviewed, we filled an entire stadium. I focused my attention on an articulate young kid who had an answer for everything. He told me that he didn't want to be on TV so I asked him then why are you wearing a monkey suit? He told me it was warm. Man that kid was SMART.

After that we unleashed the cartoon dogs on everyone. People were scared, running around like idiots, mostly because they were real life cartoons which is a dumb reason to be scared considering that cartoon dog teeth fall out so easily. Who is afraid of being gummed by Pluto? Not me.

I also took a quick trip to Utah to visit an aunt of mine who has become a hooker since the last time I saw her which was never, because I didn't even know I had a hooker aunt till just yesterday. It's kinda cool having a hooker aunt. She kept saying genius things like, "I have a hole in my butt and pants to match!" which was true, she did have a hole in her pants.

That's all for now.
Don't get caught wondering if your prostitute aunt has any hot friends even though she's like 55.
Your Last Best Hope,
Colonel Sanders

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